Welcome back. This is Marvel's Corner!

 

Today I have a special surprise. An interview with an EF ADMIN! ... I mean, EF MODERATOR!

 

Click on the blog for this once in a lifetime opportunity as this Mod tells all. 

 

Also, Marvel's Corner has reached four thousand views. I congratulate all of you, and promise to continue providing the Electric Ferret with a blog (because my fellow members are lazy/have actual lives to live). But enough about them, look no further for this special interview with a valuable EF member & Moderator. 

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Today's Topic: Moderator Interview

 

Due to unprecedented circumstances (such as me being lazy & occupied with watching as many NCIS episodes as I can) this interview is quite old. So old in fact, that our guest was an Admin at the time. Since then, things have changed. However, just remember that the following interview took place on November 22, 2009.

 

But by now you must be asking, "Marvel Man, just tell me who the Moderator is. It's Tarvius isn't it. Do we even have another Moderator?"

 

And to this I can only say, "Yes. A guy named General M. Bison also moderates the site. However, with all his world conquering plans/schemes, he is constantly forced to put the EF aside. However, you still don't know who our secret guest is..."

 

So, without any more background, I will now reveal our guest... He goes by many names, but you know him as...

 

TARVIUS!

 

http://www.electricferret.com/forum/index.php?showuser=5

 

Yes, after hiring a squad of trained Colombian drug-warriors from our friends down south, Marvel's Corner was able to get in touch with Tarvius. We asked many things, and after a few days of torture (which was mostly having him tied and forced to listen to the Twilight Series Audiobook collection) Tarvius finally cracked (everyone does... Hehe...)

 

So, what did he say? Read ahead, True Believers, and prepare to have your mind blown...

----------------------------------------------

 

About Tarvius:

 

Q. Have you ever been in a fight?

 

A: -Skip

 

MM: I, of course, assume that by this, Tarvius is trying to draw away from his bloody past. There used to be a lot of EF Moderators, but they've all been turning up missing these last few months. Coincidence?! I think not...

 

Q. What is your favorite music group?

 

A: -Metallica

 

MM: *Nods*

 

Q. What's the worst flame war you've gotten into?

 

A: -Not Sure. Most debates that I remember being in have been pretty mild.

 

MM: Keywords: "That I Remember"....

 

Q. Do you have any role models?

 

A: -I have a few.

 

MM: It was at this point in the interview where we were forced to torture Tarvius some more (We read out loud from fanfiction.net. It was brutal)

 

Q. Is there anything you will debate over on the Internet?

 

A: -Yes?

 

MM: Don't worry dear reader, we did a few vague questions before hitting the tough questions. Speaking of...

 

Q. Why did you pick your username?

 

http://cache.gawker.com/assets/images/gawker/2009/06/stephen-colbert.jpg

 

A: -Tarvius is the name of the main character in my book Gondra. Not really sure why I thought of that name for my book. I guess I just wanted something Fantasy sounding.

 

MM: I imagine this is your book cover:

 

http://www.henkbloemberg.eu/fantasy/Fantasy Art - Unicorn vs dragon (Boris Vallejo).jpg

 

Note: A few days later, I went back to Tarv and asked a few follow up questions. Here's a bit from that:

 

Follow Up Interview said:

<Marvel-Man>: Alright, do you have a place where my readers can read your book?

<Tarvius>: Not at the moment. That is, not unless you can read minds. 

<Marvel-Man>: Hmm... I can, but I'm not sure about the others.

<Tarvius>: Well...that's their loss then. 

<Marvel-Man>: Next question: Have you tried the CBUB?

<Marvel-Man>: Wait, that was pretty dumb. 

<Tarvius>: Yes. 

<Tarvius>: Yes it was. 

<Marvel-Man>: I'll need to go back and edit this.

 

MM: And edit I did. Let's move on. 

 

Q. Do you speak any other languague?

 

A: -I don't speak any languages. I just pretend to be able to speak English.

 

Q. How did you find the CBUB?

 

A: - I'm not exactly sure. All I know is that I was searching Google for who knows what

 

MM Edit: Oh, we can imagine *wink* Stock tips, right?

 

and there was a link to one of the old write-ups Serge and the other Admins use to do. Surprisingly enough I can't remember what the match was. Come to think of it I think I may have had a run in with the FPL before I hit the CBUB. Not sure about that though

 

MM: Huh. Has anyone ever found the FPL before the CBUB? I mean, I'm pretty sure there are guys on the CBUB that don't know what the FPL is. 

 

Q. What was/is your favorite school subject?

 

A: -History.

 

MM: As you can tell, I'm a vicious interviewer. I get all the juicy details. Tarv was on the ropes after that last question. 

 

Q. Is there anything you regret?

 

A: - Absolutely, both on this site, and in life outside of the site.

 

MM: Life outside the site? Clearly he's talking about the ladies. Darn it Tarv, how many shattered hearts are at your feet?!

 

About being a Moderator:

 

Q. Is Tarvius your real name?

 

A: -Secret

 

MM: I'll take that as a yes.

 

Q. What have you done to help the EF?

 

A: -Not enough

 

MM: Notice that this is an old interview. A year later I'm sure Tarv's answer is a different one. 

 

Q. Have you ever moderated a site before?

 

A: -Yes. I've been an Administrator/Moderator for Haven/Writers Kingdom for about two years.

 

MM: Excellent plug. Link to the Writers Kingdom Website:

 

http://s1.zetaboards.com/Writers_Kingdom/index/

 

Q. What are the daily challenges of moderating the EF?

 

A: - Probably dealing with some of the more immature members of the site, who insist on arguing with every point I make when in the long run I'm just trying to help the site.

 

MM: I've actually seen some of these arguments. They usually go like this:

 

Argument Tarv usually gets into said:

Tarvius: So, I think it'd be cool if we started using judges to judge the contest entries. 

Troll: What?! That's crazy, we need democracy. This is just another move towards communism and/or Nazism!

Tarvius: Actually, those two hated each other. 

Troll: Down with socialism!

Tarvius: ...

 

Tarvius: So, guys, I thought it'd be cool to get everyone to reduce the size of their signatures. Some are way too big. 

Troll: That's what she said. 

Tarvius: ...

Troll: Oh yeah, somebody high five me right now. That just happened. 

 

Tarvius: Just a reminder, multi-accounting will get you banned. 

Troll: Man, I'm glad I don't do that. Seriously, why do you keep talking about this? Unless... OMG TARVIUS IS MULTI-ACCOUNTING!

Troll #2 (who no one's ever seen before): Yeah Troll, I totally agree. Also, dude, you are so awesome. 

Troll: *high five*

 

Q. If EFers met you in real life, would they be surprised?

 

A: -I can't really say. I guess it has more to do with how often I've conversed with them. Then again I haven't exactly been an open book, so yes I'd have to say everyone would be surprised at least to some degree.

 

MM: Hmm... Maybe Tarvius is famous? Or a woman? ... Or BOTH?!

 

http://static.thehollywoodgossip.com/images/gallery/olivia-wilde-photograph.jpg

 

Ah, Olivia Wilde...

 

Q. Which do you like the most, the CBUB or the FPL?

 

A: -The FPL hands down.

 

MM: I would be lying if I said I didn't see that one coming. Once you go into the FPL, you never come out... Also, CBUB #1.

 

Q. What is your favorite Official CBUB Match?

 

A: -Hmmmmmm.... I'll have to think about that one.

 

MM: At this point, Tarvius got real quiet for several hours. Eventually we just moved on to the next question. 

 

Q. Is the EF better now that we've undergone the makeover?

 

A: -I'm a little confused with this question. I definitely like the layout better if that's what you mean. However, if you're talking about how people are acting then I do feel like the sites been overrun with irrational idiots, but I don't think that has anything to do with us moving?

 

MM: I guess the fact that it's the Internet doesn't help much. But hey, look on the bright side, the layout's the bomb. Every character gets a mini wikipedia article on their fights. Now we just have to get people to stop clicking the hide option and actually read them.

 

Q. Do you feel like Moderators aren't as respected as they should be?

 

A: -At times I suppose. Then again we don't really do that much to get respect. If there's anyone who deserves respect its, Serge and Mr. Graves who've spent hundreds of hours of their own time coding the site.

 

MM: Hundreds of hours. Do you guys hear that? That's days and days of hard work! 

 

That makes me feel lazy. Anyways, I guess Tarvius is trying to explain that Moderators' activities are shrouded in mystery and that most of the general public couldn't handle what they do. 

 

Anyways, now we hit the big one. Everyone needs to listen up. I'd tell you to turn up your speakers, but that really wouldn't do anything considering this is just text. I guess you could read the following question out loud, but you'd risk looking dumb. So just read on silently. 

 

Q. What can EF Members do to help the EF?

 

MM: Now who among us hasn't asked this? I was expecting Tarvius to link me to a donations page and explain that hosting a website isn't cheap. Maybe he'd tell me that the EF would improve if we all left the CBUB and joined the FPL instead. Instead, he said this:

 

A: - First off try to be a little more mature about things. People really need to grow up. 

 

MM Edit: I'm pretty sure we all know who he's talking to *cough* FPLers *cough*

 

Secondly, as biased as it may sound listen to the admins. They've been doing this for years, and for the most part they know what they're talking about.  

 

MM Edit: Indeed they do. I resisted asking if thats why they don't talk much (See what i did there). But seriously, I agree. They're admins for a reason. And its not just because they were here first, although, that must factor in somewhere. So listen to what they say. They are very wise.

 

Finally, think about what you're posting before you hit the post button. I guess the larger picture behind that is thinking about what you're doing.

 

MM Edit: This advice should be put on the EF FAQ (Note to self: Find out if we have a FAQ) But seriously, a lot of things would improve if we followed this sound advice. It works well outside the site as well. Just think before you act.

 

Of course there's plenty more people could be doing to help the site

 

MM Edit: Like getting a college degree in coding and helping the finish this site. Also, if any of you guys have a bunch of extra cash just sitting there (such as myself. I use my cash as firewood during the cold winter months) send them to the EF Staff. They're highly underpaid. All of them are literally working for food... Wait, no, they don't get food. What's it called when you work for free? 

 

, but these are things seem fairly important. 

Also, start typing in complete sentences, and use proper grammar

 

MM: Nevr! 

 

Note: Actually, typing in full sentences would really help everyone who likes to understand what you just wrote. So invest in a good dictionary, or learn how to use google.

 

Q. What's your favorite Disney movie?

 

A: -Don't have one.

 

MM: As you can see, like all the other admins, Tarvius is both wise and spiteful at things that bring joy to children. 

 

http://blogs.nyu.edu/blogs/bmg258/berniestakeonthead/Disney.jpg

 

Q. Did Michael Jackson die naturally?

 

A: -I think he died of a natural drug overdose

 

MM: Man this interview's old. 

 

Q. Which is better, the Wii, Playstation 3, or X-Box 360?

 

A: - They all have their pros and cons. I don't really have a favorite

 

MM: Props to Tarvius. I haven't seen someone dodge a question that skillfully since Couric interviewed Palin.

 

Q. Ever dated a blonde?

 

A: -Secret

 

MM: After answering, Tarvius let out a loud sigh and chuckled. 

 

Q. What type of phone do you have?

 

A: - IPhone

 

MM: Tarvius then spent the next twenty minutes showing me the type of apps he has. His favorite is this one app that makes it look like you're drinking beer. Actually pretty cool. 

 

http://blog.thebigwordproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/ibeer.jpg

 

Q. Which do you read, the New York Times, USA Today, or TIME?

 

A: - I read whatever I can get my hands on

 

Q. What do you look for in a woman? 

 

A: - Thinking...

 

MM: So, she just has to be able to think? Clearly, Tarvius has lowered his standards since those blonde-hunting days. Or so I assume. 

 

Q. Do you trust our government?

 

A: -Hell no.

 

MM: Smart man. Remember, Bush was president at the time of this interview, way back in... 2009? Well, then Tarv must made some type of typo...

 

Q. What's your favorite movie?

 

A: -I don't really have one.

 

Q. Which do you like more, Marvel or DC?

 

A: -Skip

 

MM: As an Admin, Tarv had to show no preference to either side. However, keep in mind that he agreed to be interviewed by "Marvel's Corner", instead of DC's Edge, my competitor. Ah, curse them...

 

Finish this Sentence:

 

Q. Barack Obama needs to ___________ in order to help America.

 

A: - Start embracing the principles of the constitution.

 

Q. These questions are ___________?

 

A: -Designed to spark an argument.

 

MM: Tarv's a smart guy. Tried to get him to spell icup later on, but he quickly refused. 

 

Q. The Inte rnet is full of ___________?

 

A: -Websites

 

MM: ...

 

Q. The biggest mistake you've ever made is __________?

 

A: -When I was just a baby, My Mama told me, "Son, Always be a good boy, Don't ever play with guns," But I shot a man in Reno, Just to watch him die, When I hear that whistle blowin', I hang my head and cry.

 

MM: A No Prize for whoever gets this reference. Seriously, I love the south, and I had trouble with it, so I don't think anyone will get it immediately.

 

Q. Power needs to be used ________?

 

A: -Electricity

 

MM: ?

 

Q. A bad EF members should be ________?

 

A: -Dealt with according to their actions.

 

MM: After this question, Tarvius smiled in a creepy fashion, then pulled out a ban-hammer. EFers, beware!

 

On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being the lowest and 10 being the highest...

 

Q. How smart are you?

 

A: - It depends who you ask.

 

MM: Indeed. Einstein might say I'm an average thinker, but guys like Jay Leno will admit I'm a genius. 

 

Q. How much do you exercise?

 

A: -6

 

MM: Huh. Tarvius may not be living in the US....

 

http://i223.photobucket.com/albums/dd94/SeabiscuitChick/fat_kid.jpg

 

Q. How often do you read?

 

A: -9

 

Q. How much do you like the EF?

 

A: -8 on a good day. 4 on a bad day.

 

MM: I'm a sure Tarvius would move his numbers up a little nowadays. We've improved quite a lot recently. Right? ... Right?!

 

Q. How good is Mexican food?

 

A: -7

 

MM: Should be a 10... However, judging from his avatar, he probably likes Asian food more...

 

Q. How good are you at martial arts?

 

A: -It depends who you ask.

 

MM: Yep. Tarvius can kill a man with the jaws of life, a life-preserver, and the irony derived of both those items.

 

Q. How much time do you spend on the EF?

 

A: -Ha too much I suppose.

 

MM: Ha. Don't we all...

 

Q. How awesome is Marvel Man?

 

A: -

 

MM: Clearly, a 1-10 scale was too small. I'm like a 100...

 

. How important is grammar?

 

A: -Very important.

 

MM: Arg! It's a 1-10 question Tarv...

 

Q. How much do you like the Admins?

 

A: -It kind of depends who you're talking about. I don't dislike any of the admins, but I prefer some to the others

 

MM: Huh. Clearly, Tarvius is hinting at the deep Admin politics that go on behind closed doors. Which reminds me... You guys want to know why Tarvius is a mod now? It's cause-...

 

ADMIN EDIT: SILENCE YOU FOOL! MUWAHAHA!

 

http://daily.likeme.net/lm/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/ed-evil-dead-zombie.jpg

 

... -and then, when the police squad had finally left, the remaining Admins agreed to demote Tarvius. It was a sad day for all. The End.

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Well, there it is. An interview with a CBUB Legend and current EF Moderator. I hope you guys all learned something (that Johnny Cash references are about as obscure as you can get on a comic book forum). 

 

Now I'd like to take a moment to thank Tarvius for agreeing to participate in this interview. The guy's great, and one of the main reasons the CBUB is still running. If you could, take a moment to thank Tarvius for all his hard work yourself. And if you're ever bored, learn how to draw his avatar. Impress Asian chicks & what not.

 

Anyways, that's it for today. This is Marvel Man, signing off. 

Excelsior!

 

Fun Fact: Tarvius' original name was Superwolverineman, and you should all do your best to convince him to change it back (how awesome would it be if Wolverine was Superman?! However, would he be able to use his adamantium claws, or would his indestructible skin cancel that out?) Anyways, that just goes to show that there isn't a better guy to moderate this comic book forum. Thanks Tarvius!