Welcome back ladies and gentlemen. This is Marvel's Corner!

 

Now, before we begin, I want to apologize for the our absence. You may not know it, but due to the dire economic recession, I was force to fire most of my staff.

 

Well, the staff didn't take it that well, (They kept talking about the fact that they needed to feed their families or something). In desperation, they tried to keep me from blogging (They even formed picket lines!) Well, a few months later, and the strike is officially over. My staff is back, plus, they all get new health benefits. Oh, and the mandatory group showers have been closed down. 

 

Anyways, enough chit chat. This blog's not like my past posts (You won't find news about comics, Marvel, or pictures of attractive women). This blog is aimed at the CBUB. So, whether you're a hardened vet who's seen countless Superman vs Goku matches, a newbie who is still wondering who would win a fight between Goku and Superman, or an FPLer who will deny ever watching DBZ, step inside. The CBUB's fate lies in your hands...

 

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Today's Topic: The Comic Book Battle Universe (CBUB)

 

Now, I'm gonna split this post into three things. 

 

1. The CBUB, Then and Now. 

2. The Achilles Heel of the CBUB

3. What You Can Do to Save the CBUB

 

Let's start with a quick history lesson. 

 

1. The CBUB, Then and Now

 

The story of the CBUB, is one as old as time itself, (So, about 14 years). It deals with the new Internet Age, Global Warming, and several powerful Colombian drug lords. But most importantly, it deals with a man known simply as serge.

 

Few people know who serge is, and even less know why his name isn't capitalized. What we do know, is that serge created the Electric Ferret in 1996. The reasons why are unknown. Although, theories range from the sensible "He wanted to create a place for comic book fans.", to the strange "He really likes ferrets... And electricity?".

 

http://ferretbedding.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/ferret.jpg

Then again, who doesn't like ferrets?

 

Anyways, in the beginning, the CBUB was a place of good, where massive crowds gathered to watch two fictional characters fight to the death. Indeed, these were good times for the CBUB, when men could have hilariously long usernames, and women were... They were somewhere, probably hidden behind equally long usernames. Anyways, the CBUB's former glory can still be seen in the archives:

 

http://www.electricferret.com/fights/

 

However, all good things must come to an end, and the CBUB's came from two different directions. One, was allowing members to create their own fights, which although a good concept, eventually led to the CBUB's decline, as terrible set ups outnumbered the good ones. 

 

The second, was the creation of the FPL, which would, over the years, steal away promising writers from the CBUB. As the writing gap between the two sisters widened, it was clear which side the CBUB was on. She was the fat cheerleader at the bottom of the pyramid, while the FPL was the hot one who could cheat off anyone in her math class (cause her parents would be so disappointed if she got anything but an A...). 

 

To make matters worse, serge, the creator, was able to move on to bigger things. Leaving the CBUB, serge began a successful chain of fast food restaurants. You know these chains as "Burger King" (Or so my sources claim...).  

 

With these formidable forces working against it, the once great CBUB fell. 

 

And fell. 

 

And fell. 

 

Until it hit rock bottom. 

 

Then it fell some more. 

 

During these cold, dark years, the CBUB was plagued by multi-accounters, bad matches, and poor writing. 

 

For a while, it looked like the CBUB had reached the end. It wrote a will, picked out where it wanted to be buried, and called all its family. But then, just as the darkness began to engulf the CBUB, there was a sudden flash of light! 

 

The creator, serge, had returned!

 

http://www.getintouch.dk/data/media/Gospel_Choir.jpg

Hallelujah!

 

With a new layout, a new 6 point system in place, and the FPL out of commission, it looked like the CBUB would return to its former glory. 

 

Sadly, this was not to be. The CBUB continued down the road to destruction. So, nothing could save it?

 

Not if serge can help it!

 

Again, he returns!

 

But is it enough to save the CBUB?

 

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2. The Achilles Heel of the CBUB

 

So, why is the CBUB failing?

 

A lot of folks would like to say that the Character Database is to blame. "We can't add characters!", they'll say. "My match ideas are being limited!", they'll say. 

 

So, is this the CBUB's flaw?

 

No. 

 

While Character Additions have been down for a while, it's not the reason why the CBUB is how it is. There are countless match possibilities available with the existing Database. Besides, the Database is full of characters no one has ever used in a match. 

 

That's not it. 

 

Well, is it a lack of knowledge? After all, if you use a character no one has ever heard of, your match will most likely be ignored. Or, if you pit an unknown character against a well known one, odds are most will vote for who they know. 

 

So, is that the flaw?

 

Nope. 

 

You see, serge already fixed this. Sort of. 

 

Right below every character, in every match, are helpful links that will explain any character to anyone who can click a mouse. Most probably don't use it, but it's there. Like recycle bins, they're there to help, even if most simply ignore them. 

 

Is it the System itself? After all, the CBUB allows anyone to use up to six characters! That right belongs to people who can complete a sentence without misspelling simple words. Right?

 

http://www.cornichon.org/caveman.gif

 

No, that's not it. 

 

You see, serge was too smart to fall into such an easy trap. The System corrects itself. Sort of. 

 

Right below every match, you should see a grading box, where you can give a set up an "It's Bad", "It's Okay", or an "It's Good" (serge removed the "OMG, THIS IS AWESOME!" option, sadly...). This should keep bad writers somewhat limited.

 

But wait, couldn't bad writers or multi-accounters just give themselves good ratings? Did you think of that, serge?

 

"Haha! Don't make me laugh!"

- serge (Not actual quote...)

 

You actually have to have a good enough rating to rate others. 

 

Point, serge. 

 

So, that's not it either. 

 

But wait, it's the writers' fault! After all, who writes the matches? Who uses the same characters over and over?

 

So, is it the writers?

 

Sorry, but no. 

 

You see, for every dozen of terrible writers, who write a two sentenced set up, there is at least one decent writer who actually thinks about his match. You'll recognize this guy as the one who spells "definitely" right. 

 

So, putting the blame on the writers is unfair. 

 

But then, who do we blame?! ... I mean, how do we address the problem, if we don't know what it is?

 

I'll tell you. 

 

The Achilles Heel of the CBUB....

 

Is...

 

...

 

....

 

YOU!

 

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_bxAOpzlV7Qo/SxTBWTZSuVI/AAAAAAAAACY/DcgiYQGYBLQ/s1600/dramatic-chipmunk.gif

 

Well, not you, you. Specifically, it's the commentator's fault. And the raters. And the voters. And the viewers. 

 

And who's that?

 

You. 

 

"Huh?", you might be asking yourself (And it's really weird when you talk to yourself, specially when you're browsing the Internet).

 

Let me explain. 

 

1. The System is set up to keep bad writers down, while rewarding good writers. However, without people to rate matches, it can't do it's job. 

 

2. Good writers want their hard work to be rewarded. What's that reward? It's comments. Ask any writer, and they'll tell you that good comments are always appreciated (They normally say things like "I write matches for my own enjoyment." That's a lie. We all crave comments). But without commentators, writers are discouraged, and often stop writing at all.

 

3. On the opposite side of the spectrum, overdone matches, those Goku vs Superman/Thanos vs Darkseid/JLA vs Avengers matches get tons of attention. Even if they have set ups that even a five year old would mock, they'll get tons of views and comments. And who gives those comments and views? 

 

You do. 

 

And then, later, most of the CBUBers will complain about how their matches get ignored, and/or that bad matches are everywhere. Well, guess who's commenting on those bad matches and ignoring the good ones?

 

You are. 

 

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_bxAOpzlV7Qo/SxTBWTZSuVI/AAAAAAAAACY/DcgiYQGYBLQ/s1600/dramatic-chipmunk.gif

 

But wait, there is still hope. The EF's founder, serge, has returned to beat the imperfections out of the system. Adding Characters will come back, and minor bugs shall be crushed as well. But the main flaw isn't the system. So, is the CBUB doomed?

 

No. And the hope has a name:

 

*Insert Your Name Here*

 

http://www.gao.gov/about/history/articles/images/wecan.jpg

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3. What You Can Do to Save the CBUB

 

I'll wrap this up so you can start. 

 

1. Go Back to the CBUB!

 

A lot of you guys reading this might be agreeing with what I'm saying (or you could totally disagree. Comment and tell me.), but odds are that you haven't been to the CBUB in a while. Yes, I'm taking to you, forum crowd. Well, if you want the CBUB to be enjoyable, go back and participate. 

 

It's that, or keep things the same. Without the CBUB, it's just the FPL. And do you really want to head into the FPL? They'll devour your soul!

 

http://images.cheezburger.com/completestore/2009/8/1/128936648628775770.jpg

 

... Okay. So, you're back in the CBUB, wondering what happened to the cool comic-y background. Now what?

 

2. Comment

 

If you see a good match, write a comment! Even if you can't rate a match, tell the guy who wrote it that it was a cool match. If you don't know who's fighting, and can't tell who'd win, at least tell the guy that his set up was good.

 

Well...

 

That's it.

 

Yes, just those two steps will help tremendously. By rewarding good writers with comments, you'll start to see more good matches. 

 

Yes, rating the matches is important too. As is writing a match yourself. But the most important thing, is commenting. 

 

Don't believe me?

 

Check the old Back Pages/Issues again. What do you see in the CBUB's golden years?

 

http://www.electricferret.com/fights/

 

There's a good match up, between closely matched characters. There's a short, often witty banter between two commentators (Pat & Jay, Callisto & Clown Girl, etc.) Then what?

 

Comments. 

 

Tons of comments. 

 

Some are funny. Some make good points. Some have dirty jokes in them. Some wrote detailed reviews of the match. Some reference old movies.

 

All are interesting. 

 

After that, there's a short recap of the match, where we see the fight through the eyes of the commentators.

 

And it's over. 

 

Now, hopefully you caught what made the old CBUB awesome. It wasn't the match ups. It wasn't who won. 

 

It was the comments. 

 

And who makes the comments?

 

You do. 

 

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So, that's it. I've done what I can. The rest, is up to you. 

 

Until next time, this is Marvel Man, signing off. 

Excelsior!