Match 14661 Yang Xiao Long vs. Joe Fixit

[AVP vs The Terminator]

Yang Xiao Long was not having a good day.

Granted, that had been the case even before whatever the heck all this was. Last thing she remembered, pretty much one of the worst days in the entire history of Remnant had been in full swing, with her and her fellow intrepid heroes having been declared enemies of the state by a guy neck-deep in probably the worst midlife crisis in recorded history. That had been pretty bad. Even worse had been the tidal wave of oncoming darkness that appeared over the horizon in the immediate aftermath, bent on swallowing up the most densely-populated of all the known kingdoms in a storm of violence and evil. Even as something of an optimist herself, she would've considered it fair to say she wasn't exactly left in the most optimistic of headspaces.

But this? This took the cake. As terrible and bleak as they had been, those were the last recollections in her mind that made any kind of rational sense. Everything was just a blank after that, and the next thing she knew she found herself in the middle of, of all things, some kind of... waiting room? One with a line. A long one, at that. Given her storied history of anger issues and a distinct absence of every single one of the people who helped ground her through them, suffice to say she wasn't exactly having much luck finding her zen.

"WHAT IS HAPPENING?! LISTEN, IF YOU DON'T TELL ME WHERE MY FRIENDS ARE IN THE NEXT FIVE SECONDS I'M GONNA—!"

The terrified attendant she was holding a foot or so off the ground by his collar waved his hands in a placating fashion, to little effect. "M-M-Miss, please, if you just watch your introductory video package-"

"I WATCHED YOUR STUPID VIDEO! How's that supposed to make any of this okay?! You seriously expect me to believe I'm FAKE or something? What the hell is a 'Khazan' even supposed to be?"

Not far from the commotion, two of the hapless man's co-workers were observing their friend's misfortune with leery expressions, murmuring to one another out of the corner of their lips so as not to draw any of the woman's ire themselves.

"Sheesh, there's always so much drama with these anime types."

"Technically she's from an anime-inspired web cartoon."

"Shut the fuck up. Where the hell did our block's security go, anyway? Shouldn't Fixit be, y'know... fixing it?"

"Smoke break. He shouldn't be much longer."

"W-well... what about Callisto?"

"Drinking in her office."

"Shit, again?"

"And who're all these... these FREAKS?!"

She gestured wildly behind her in the direction of the rest of the queue using her free arm, the faint whirr of servos audible from its bionic design. The line was piled up all the way out of the room and into the next one, her own placement surrounded by just about the most bizarre, eclectic group of individuals she'd ever laid eyes on, pretty much all of whom were about as confused or frustrated as she was. Most were giving the scene a wide berth, while some didn't seem too concerned at all. Three rougher men were grouped together the farthest away from the disturbance, two middle-aged and one considerably younger; the other two seemed to be trying to discourage their balding, aggressive friend from getting involved in the violence himself, though from the wild look in his eye they were having little luck. Some kind of huge, musclebound alien wearing red-and-black spandex was ignoring the commotion altogether, stance powerful and arms crossed as he calmly occupied his space in line, easily mistakable for a statue, while two bishy anime boys hovered on the fringes, trying to stay as uninvolved as possible.

The only one to react to the insult proper was the one who somehow looked more out-of-place than anybody, a skinny guy wearing a cape and rubber gloves whose head shined like a freshly polished mirror.

"Hey, that's kinda rude."

She whirled on him, eyes a molten red that glared into his very heart and soul. He didn't seem very intimidated, which only incensed her further. "What, you wanna go too?!"

"I mean, we're in the same boat here, but if you won't calm down we might have to. I wouldn't say I want to, though. No offense, but none of you guys seem like you'd be all that much of a challenge. 'Cept maybe this dude," he added, thumbing over at the stoic alien. Jiren didn't move, though one eye cracked open to size up the man who challenged him before he closed it again without a word, unimpressed. He didn't even sense any ki from him. "I get this is all pretty weird, but can't you just relax and let him explain before things get out of hand?"

Yang growled in frustration, seeming to see the merit in the baldy's words, though she didn't release the attendant just yet. He nodded eagerly, waving his hands once more. "T-Thank you, sir. Like I keep saying, we're terribly sorry for the wait, but the Khazan Naturalization and Immigration Bureau is experiencing an unprecedented influx of new arrivals currently! So many new canons have gained prominence in the seven years since we closed our borders! It's insane! We're doing the best we can, but my colleagues and I are swamped, and with the security breach that closed us to begin with requiring so many new protocols-"

The onslaught of history and buzzwords did little to soothe the temperamental huntress, and there was a more desperate ring to her aggression as she cut across him again with another, albeit less vigorous, shake of his collar. "I don't care! I don't care about ANY of that! I don't even get what you're saying! Ruby Rose, Blake Belladonna, and Weiss Schnee. THOSE are my friends' names. I wanna see them, I don't care about my place in line! Just... just take me to them!"

Sensing her beginning to calm, the attendant's eyes widened further. "Miss, please, I understand, but if they haven't been processed yet then there's no way of telling how far back they might be! It could be miles! Once you've all been cleared for entry I assure you they should be easy to find, but right now violence doesn't help—"

That was when one of the two criminal types trying to herd their mangy friend in the corner gave a shout, a paunchy but rugged-seeming man pushing fifty. "Ey, ey, Trev NAW-"

The scary one shoved free of the other two's grip, eyes flared wide with impatience and bloodlust.

"NAH, THE BIMBO'S RIGHT! LET'S GO FUCKIN' CRAZY, MICHAEL! YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"

He didn't have the patience for bureaucracy, anyway. He pulled out an uzi and ran into the thick of it, tearing up the furnishings in the waiting room in a hail of chaotic bullets.  The more durable of the characters present, like the alien and baldy, just stood there placidly and allowed the rounds to ping off them, while most of the line and the attendants present screamed and went scrambling for cover as Los Santos's own Trevor Philips whooped with malicious glee.

That was when Yang punched him so hard he defied physics, bouncing several times off the room's carpet and tiled ceiling before he disappeared through a window and plunged towards the Khazan streets far below.

WASTED

'Bimbo'. Seriously.

She blinked when she saw blood on her metallic knuckles, wiping it off and shooting his two friends a worried look. "Um... is he gonna be okay? He felt... squishy..."

The one called Michael, though mortified, waved off her concern. "Ahh, he'll be fine. This stuff happens to us all the time, right Frank?"

His friend nodded, glancing down as a distracting buzzing from his pocket caught his attention and he fished his phone out. "Yeah. Shit, that's him now. Fool probably wants us to pick him up from the hospital or some shit."

"Eh. Don't answer it."

Yang huffed, a mixture of relief and the frustration continuing to gnaw at her insides. At least she'd been given something to work it out on, but she still—

Her train of thought was quite literally punched out of her skull as a massive, grey fist collided with it, giving her the chance to experience what it was like to be the one on the receiving end of being flung across the room for once as she crashed through some furniture and found herself embedded in the room's back wall, dazed. What had once been a line of soon-to-be Khazan citizens once again turned into a panicked mob as it stampeded all the way back to the other end of the room again, though the bald guy and alien still held onto their place in the queue and just accepted they were a part of events at this point.

The titanic blow's perpetrator calmly waded through the throng of panicking migrants and cracked his knuckles. He was huge, he'd been doing this a long time, and he was getting real tired of all these upstarts causing scenes and kicking up a fuss. That wasn't how they did it back in his day.

Especially when he was on shift.

Fixit flicked his fedora off and rolled his tree trunk neck out to either side, grimacing at the stiffness of his joints and dual pops that sounded with each motion. The grey-skinned titan glanced over at the attendant little miss hothead had been manhandling, lips parting in a questioning grunt.

"I hit the right blonde, right?"

The worker nodded, pale skin reflection the apprehension he felt toward the way all this was going at this point. Things usually settled down after Fixit knocked some sense into the less accepting among their glorious city's new arrivals, but from the snarl etched into the face of the young woman already fishing herself out of the rubble he was concerned they might've been in for something a little more sustained.

"Oh YEAH?!" She yelled, honestly grateful for the opportunity to work out her rage on something a little meatier as she climbed out of the crater he'd left her in. Big, ugly monster guy. Sure, whatever. She could do that. Her eyes were a flaming crimson by this point, and her thick blanket of hair was already shimmering with waves of fiery energy at the sheer amount of energy she'd taken in from that one blow, feeling the strength course through her body and dropping into a stance.

"Ooh. You're mad," came Fixit's slow, condescending drawl, the sight bringing a savage grin to his face as he held out his arms to either side and waited for her to come.

"Cute."

---

Weakest but most cunning version of the Hulk vs strongest but angriest of team RWBY. Win by KO, BFR or pacification. Go.

Most people prolly know the score with Fixit, but here's a listing of basically all Yang's showings if anyone needs em. I have no idea why it says nsfw, there's nothing raunchy on there. Idk how many people here know RWBY if any at all but nyeh, these are still fun to write.

[Callisto]

Learn More About
Yang Xiao Long
Read more about Yang Xiao Long at Wikipedia
Official Site: RoosterTeeth Links: Wikipedia

Joe Fixit
Read more about Joe Fixit at Wikipedia
Official Site: Marvel.com Links: Wikipedia Incrediblehulkonline Wikia

[corvette1710]

Excellent write-up. I like how you've incorporated Khazan lore a lot.

[SSJRuss]

First off, I absolutely loved this. I liked the setting and Khazan having this bureau for all the new characters coming in was so fun.

And nice touch adding the new submissions to the piece.

I watch Rwby (except the last season) and Yang is probably one of my favorites. She can hold her own here but Joe still gets the win. Yang will tire out before he does and he can just snap that cybernetic arm and put her at a disadvantage.

[AVP vs The Terminator]

Thanks guys! I was basically just staring at the recently added list trying to come up with a match and it came to me to do something where I incorporated all of them as cameos, haha. I kinda wrote the whole thing around that. Might do more with the premise of Khazan opening up after a long time and trying to process this whole backlog of new arrivals, we'll see.

42 minutes ago, SSJRuss said:

I watch Rwby (except the last season) and Yang is probably one of my favorites. She can hold her own here but Joe still gets the win. Yang will tire out before he does and he can just snap that cybernetic arm and put her at a disadvantage.

Honestly I thought the last season was one of the best, would hella recommend. Yang takes kind of a backseat in it which is a bummer but she still gets some good showings in (there's this one lady strong enough to flip an elephant Grimm absurdly high into the air and later on Yang both trades blows with and gets the better of her, on top of being the one that kills the aforementioned elephant ultimately). Definitely figured most versions of Hulk would be too much for her so I was torn between the MCU version and Fixit, decided on the latter in the end cuz he's got a pretty stellar fight record and I liked the idea of doing an old guard vs new guard type deal. Thanks for commenting!

[SSJRuss]

31 minutes ago, AVP vs The Terminator said:

Thanks guys! I was basically just staring at the recently added list trying to come up with a match and it came to me to do something where I incorporated all of them as cameos, haha. I kinda wrote the whole thing around that. Might do more with the premise of Khazan opening up after a long time and trying to process this whole backlog of new arrivals, we'll see.

Honestly I thought the last season was one of the best, would hella recommend. Yang takes kind of a backseat in it which is a bummer but she still gets some good showings in (there's this one lady strong enough to flip an elephant Grimm absurdly high into the air and later on Yang both trades blows with and gets the better of her, on top of being the one that kills the aforementioned elephant ultimately). Definitely figured most versions of Hulk would be too much for her so I was torn between the MCU version and Fixit, decided on the latter in the end cuz he's got a pretty stellar fight record and I liked the idea of doing an old guard vs new guard type deal. Thanks for commenting!

Thanks for the recommendation. I'll definitely check it out because I miss the show.

Fixit seems like the perfect opponent in this scenario. If Yang goes all out and gets a lucky shot in, Joe could be in trouble.

This just makes me think of all the fights we're going to get with the new Immortal Hulk. Can't wait for that.

[AVP vs The Terminator]

2 minutes ago, SSJRuss said:

Thanks for the recommendation. I'll definitely check it out because I miss the show.

Fixit seems like the perfect opponent in this scenario. If Yang goes all out and gets a lucky shot in, Joe could be in trouble.

This just makes me think of all the fights we're going to get with the new Immortal Hulk. Can't wait for that.

Immortal Hulk is AMAZING. I honestly think it's my favorite take on the character since Fixit himself. Might look into adding that incarnation to the database actually...

[SSJRuss]

1 hour ago, AVP vs The Terminator said:

Immortal Hulk is AMAZING. I honestly think it's my favorite take on the character since Fixit himself. Might look into adding that incarnation to the database actually...

We are totally on the same page today. Was just thinking he should be added.

[ND7]

Sorry for not commenting on this sooner! I think this was an excellent write-up and the framing of Khazan was great! The idea of characters like Jiren, Joker, and Saitama just casually standing around as Yang and Fixit throw hands is hilarious. Almost feels like it'd be the backdrop for a 2D-fighting game with Jiren paying the battle no mind, Saitama just wanting to get the paperwork done so he can catch up the latest sale in the Khazan Market, and Joker and Bell just wanting to make it out of here in one piece. 

I can't really say I speak as an authority on Joe but after doing some research on him, I feel like I'm leaning more towards him! Yang's punches are definitely gonna be felt given the feats we've seen her pull off like punching away a Ursa just as big-if not bigger than Joe or smashing a mecha built for war with nothing but her bare fists. Joe's best bet would be to try and place Yang into something of a submission hold and choke her out before letting this drag out for too long. Because if he gets stronger and stronger and gives Yang one good punch, he's not gonna like it when she returns that same level of PUNCH right back at him. 

Awesome write up, my friend. : ) 

[C.T.]

Yeah I agree, well done on the writing here and also yeah, feel like Joe's best bet would be choking her out or grappling or something like that aye. Trading blows is an inadvisable strategy, though if that goes on long enough I feel like Yang's aura would break before Joe's out for the count. 

[SSJRuss]

Kind of off-topic, but this fight makes me wonder how great a Arc Systems Works VS Marvel game would be.

[Callisto]

Match Final Results

RATINGS SCORE: 5.00
0 regular members rated the match.
5 CBUB Match Judges rated the match.

MATCH SCORE
Yang Xiao Long: 13
Joe Fixit: 9

[Fox]

I like the Yang Xiao Long character on RWBY.  Her character arc took a dark turn, but she adjusted.

Glad to see she had this win in her against a tough contender.

Top tier fight set-up.  High quality.