Jump to content
Rumble 20541 Batman (Nolanverse) vs. Judas Breed
MATCH SCORE
Batman: 2
Judas Breed: 0

Tournament - MST3K vs. Athena (Tomorrowland)
MATCH SCORE
MST3K: 4
Athena (Tomorrowland): 0

Rumble 20540 Oroku Hiroto vs. Samael vs. Kim Minsu
MATCH SCORE
Oroku Hiroto: 0
Samael: 1
Kim Minsu: 3

Rumble 20539 Whitespikes vs. The Xenomorphs
MATCH SCORE
Whitespikes: 0
The Xenomorphs: 3

Cameron Poe vs. Castor Troy
MATCH SCORE
Cameron Poe: 3
Castor Troy: 0

Match 15383 Kesuke Miyagi vs. Chuck Norris


Boratz

Recommended Posts

"Welcome to Multi-Galactic Entertainment Sports Programing Network or MGESPN where we bring you sports from all planets, all the time! Stay tuned later for our main event in a karate competition like none other. On one corner, a legend in the karate community! Medal of Honor recipient, hero, sensei, and friend. Let's put our hands to get for Kesuke Miyagi as some of you know him, Mr. Miyagi. Now on the other corner, a legend that needs no introduction... the Texas Ranger, the man that has a fist under his beard, and that death is too afraid of coming near... put your hands together for Chuck Norris! Now tune in later as this fight unfolds for a match of the century. And now a word from our sponsor...."

 

*******

 

Ever get bored with the same old burgers and fries. Ever wonder if there is anything more than tacos out there. Ever get tired basic foot long sub sandwich.

 

WELL COME TO BURRITO-DOME!!!! THE NEW NAME IN A FOOD EATING EXPERIENCE! OUR MENU HAS EVERYTHING! EVERYTHING!!! 

 

TRY OUR INFINITE BURRITO! BURGER, PIZZA, FRIES, JALEPANOS, RICE, STEAK, CHICKEN, QUESO, GUACAMOLE, SHRIMP, BACON, EGGS, BEANS, TOMATOES, CARNE ASADA, CHORIZO, DORITOS, MEATBALLS, RAMEN NOODLES AND LAYERED WITH CHEESE!!!! THIS BURRITO HAS EVERYTHING! AND WE MEAN EVERYTHING!

 

DON'T BE AFRAID TO FINISH THIS BEAST OFF WITH OUR 52 OUNCE MEGA SMASHER SODAS! 

 

YOU WILL DEFINITELY NEED AN UPPER DECK WITH THIS COMBO!

 

SO STOP BY TODAY!

 

*******

 

"Wow an Infinity Burrito at Burrito-Dome... As they are a sponsor, I am obligated to share that is a great deal, but as a human being.... Well that sounds like instant death waiting to happen. Later on, we are going to interview both Mr. Miyagi and Chuck Norris before this legendary bout but before we get to that. Let's look at a race that will sure excite many who are waiting to see it!

 

In this race; we have The Flash, Quicksilver, Dash, Zoom, A Train, and the Road Runner! Oh what an exciting time to tune in as we watch these contestants compete for speed. Let's hope none of them alter time! We are all looking at you, Barry!

 

And they're o.... well as quickly as it started, it has already ended! It looks like our time line is still intact... mostly... Using our slow motion cameras brought to us by Stark Industries; it does appear that Flash has won this race! 

 

While he may have won this race; I would say that we were all entertained! I have not seen a race quite like this since Speed Racer, Ricky Bobby, Dominic Torreto, those Duke boys from Hazard, Herbie, Christine, Cole Trickle, and KITT competed at the Titan Speedway! I think they are still cleaning up motor oil from that one, maybe some parts too!

 

And now we will be back in a few moments with Mr. Miyagi and Chuck Norris... In the meantime, we will have a short commercial break...

 

*******

 

"It is that time of year again and Christmas is fast approaching. How about instead of getting your loved one's a brand new car or even the newest gaming system; you get them something they will cherish for the rest of their lives?! From Skywalker Pods, here is the Pod Racer 9000! Oh Vegeta would be so proud as this has a power level of over 9000! 

 

RACE YOUR FRIENDS!

 

RACE YOUR FAMILY!

 

RACE TO THE SUPER MARKET TO GET THE LAST HOLIDAY FRUIT CAKE!

 

WITH THE POD RACER 9000, YOU WILL MAKE SLOW LIFE, FAST LIFE! 

 

Limited time offer so call the number on the screen below!

 

****note Skywalker Pods is not responsible or liable for any crashes, unsafe maneuvers, or accidents that lead to death, disfigurement, decapitation, injury, disembodiment, or any other serious conditions while using this Pod. The Pod Racer 9000 cannot be ingested and should not be challenged to do so.****

 

********

 

 

"And we're back! Standing with me is Mr. Miyagi himself, Kesuke Miyagi. Mr. Miyagi, I have to ask; what are your thoughts on tonight's big fight?"

 

"No thoughts. Fighting is fighting. No honor in fighting." Miyagi said with a stern look on his face.

 

"That is an interesting point as we have recently learned that you are fighting for the prize money. Money that, well is our understanding, you want to use towards treatment for a Daniel Larusso's mother! Isn't that right?"

 

"Yes, money will help Daniel-San’s mother." Mr. Miyagi responded with the same stern look on his face.

 

"Interesting! Well audience, if you remember; Daniel Larusso is Mr. Miyagi's first student that fought in the All Valley Karate tournament and won it back to back! The first time with a crane kick to former All Valley Karate Champion, Johnny Lawrence's face! A kick that I may add is still debated to this day!" 

 

"No debate. Daniel-San won." Mr. Miyagi said with yet again the same stern look.

 

"Okay! Okay, Mr. Miyagi! You heard it from the legend himself. Tonight he fights for the health of his student's mother! What an honorable cause and an honorable legend!"

 

"No honor in fight. Only fight when needed. Daniel-San's mother need me to fight." Mr. Miyagi said.

 

"Wow! Truly inspiring! Momentarily we will be meeting up with Chuck Norris but before we get to that. Let's take a look at something that has not happened in over a decade. We have a sudden death round in the Dodgeball competition that has not been seen since Average Joe's and Global Gym in Las Vegas! We sure have come a long way since then! Tonight, is a match up like none other between the Pun's Nuns and the Lightning Strikes! I will switch it over to Cotton McKnight and Pepper Brooks as they spectate this round!"

 

*********

 

"Thanks! And as it was said, we have not seen a sudden-death round since Peter Lafleur of the Average Joe's eliminated White Goodman of Globo Gym in a stunning upset! What a night that was?" Cotton said as he looked upon the two contestants.

 

"YEAH COTTON! That night had a sudden death round." Pepper responded as he also looked upon the two contestants. Cotton glanced over at Pepper with a confused look.

 

"And here we go, the captain for the Pun's Nun's... a Miss Valek has gone back to throw the ball but.... OH SHE MISS COMPLETELY! LIGHTNING STRIKE'S CAPTAIN, WALLY HAS THROWN THE BALL! OH MY GOODNESS! RIGHT IN VALEK'S FACE!" Cotton exclaimed as he watched the Dodgeball Championship end with the Sudden Death elimination of the Pun's Nuns

 

"Yeah Cotton, it looks like the Nuns lost this round!" Pepper said as he glanced over at Cotton.

 

"And with that, it appears Lightning has struck twice. The Nuns may need to do a little more dodging and a little less praying." Cotton said sarcastically.

 

"She did not dodge that one, Cotton." Pepper said.

 

"Back to you at MGESPN!" Cotton said as he looked blankly at Pepper.

 

**********

 

"Thanks Cotton! And that is the end of the Dodgeball Champion! What an event?! Lightning Strikes is the Galactic Dodgeball Champion! Now, here I am with Chuck Norris. Mr. Norris, how do believe this match will go?"

 

"I do not believe in underestimating an opponent. I believe Mr. Miyagi is a great fighter and I have the upmost respect for him. I do believe that I will overcome and defeat him tonight." Chuck said with a smile.

 

"Wow! Do those Chuck Norris facts ever get to your head?" 

 

"Those facts are fun and all, but they do not truly describe me!" Chuck Norris humbly said.

 

"What do you plan on doing if you win tonight?" 

 

"I am going to donate half to the children's hospital and the other half to the Texas Rangers!" Chuck Norris replied.

 

"There you have it! Both of these great legends are great men in life! Now stay tuned as the fight is about to begin! We will be back with you after our commercial break!

 

*********

 

Next summer!

 

From the studio that brought You

 

FROZEN

 

WRECK IT RALPH

 

MOANA

 

AND SO MANY MORE...

 

Comes a new Disney Masterpiece! 

 

Watch as a young Yautja breaks away from tradition and culture to become the galaxy's greatest country singer, as he journeys across the galaxy! Along the way, the young Yautja forms an unlikely friendship with a xenomorph and together they learn what it means to make their own destiny!

 

Featuring  new original songs by:

 

HARLEY QUINN

 

ROBOCOP

 

BROLY

 

AND PETER B. PARKER

 

Disney's Predator

 

RATED: G

 

************

 

"Now the moment that you all have been waiting for; and here with me is former Dunder Mifflin Regional Manager of Scranton, MICHAEL SCOTT!"

 

"SETTLE DOWN! SETTLE DOWN, LADIES AND GERMS!" Michael yelled as he sat down.

 

"I think there are literal crickets in the audience tonight, Mr. Scott. No applause was given! I kid! kid! Well it looks like the Judge, for tonight, Dwight Schrute, is going over the rules with the contestants now."

 

"Funny! We never had rules where I grew up. We didn't have rules on those street; except no kicks to the groins and be home by dinner!" Michael said smiling.

 

"How do you think you'd fare against Mr. Miyagi or Chuck Norris, Mr. Scott?"

 

"Oh I'd beat them! Easily! I've beaten a lot of black belts and I beat Dwight down there in a fight. I kicked his ass in fact!" Michael said with an even larger smile.

 

"Woah woah woah, Mr. Scott! Watch your language! Kids watch this channel! But funny that you mention your fight with Dwight. We also have a clip of you getting slapped in the face by your receptionist and crying like a baby afterwards!"

 

"I WASN'T CRYING! I have really bad allergies and the sun was in my eyes! She wasn’t even the receptionist; she was a salesperson! And..... I actually liked it by the way!" Michael responded with a now stern look.

 

"Okay! Whatever you say, Mr. Scott! Let's go down to Dwight now!"

 

*******

 

"LISTEN! I am very tough and I am very fair! One wrong move and I will personally get you off of this mat! No identity theft, no cheating, no cheap shots, no office equipment in jello! None of that!" Dwight declared as her looked at both Mr. Miyagi and Chuck Norris. 

 

Both opponents nodded at Dwight and bowed to him. Both Mr. Miyagi and Chuck Norris bowed to one another!

 

"FIGHT!" Dwight roared

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 11/30/2020 at 10:19 AM, Boratz said:

Featuring  new original songs by:

 

HARLEY QUINN

Songs by Harley, you say? :D 

Good set-up, Boratz. You have the personalities of Miyagi and Norris down pat, and the announcers make for an engaging team. I gotta admit, though, the ads and sports updates, while entertaining, were almost a bit much.

As for the match, I'll go with Miyagi for this. Chuck may be very good in his own right in martial arts, Miyagi was one of the greatest practitioners of a style of karate created by and passed down through his family, and knows techniques few others have learned. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, DSkillz said:

Songs by Harley, you say? :D 

Good set-up, Boratz. You have the personalities of Miyagi and Norris down pat, and the announcers make for an engaging team. I gotta admit, though, the ads and sports updates, while entertaining, were almost a bit much.

As for the match, I'll go with Miyagi for this. Chuck may be very good in his own right in martial arts, Miyagi was one of the greatest practitioners of a style of karate created by and passed down through his family, and knows techniques few others have learned. 

When I put songs by Harley, I did not think about her actually singing in BTAS. I was just trying to think of the most random characters

Thanks the feedback! If I do something like this again, I'll try to tone it back a bit on the ads and sports updates; was trying something a little out of the ordinary 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This gets 5 stars just based on creativity alone. I love this. I don't personally care about the combatants, but I'm a big fan of the Dodgeball movie and your commercials were great. Disney's Predator? That would be crazy.

I never really bought into the Chuck Norris super power thing. It's fun but I think Mr. Miyagi wins this fight.

  • Thanks 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

29 minutes ago, SSJRuss said:

This gets 5 stars just based on creativity alone. I love this. I don't personally care about the combatants, but I'm a big fan of the Dodgeball movie and your commercials were great. Disney's Predator? That would be crazy.

I never really bought into the Chuck Norris super power thing. It's fun but I think Mr. Miyagi wins this fight.

Thank you so much!

Rumor has it that they are going to make yet another Predator movie and with Disney buying out Fox, I thought it would be a funny tie in!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...