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Al Rossi: Hellooo, fight fans! Coming to live from the Bunker, its Al Rossi and Andel Sanap! Andel Sanap: And may the Force be with you all! Al Rossi: It’s great to be back with another fight for you! We were being cautious with our security following the events of the Fox tribute, but now we are certain that we are able to continue giving you fans great action. And tonight, it’s going to be a face off between two of the most famous names in law enforcement: Cordell Walker, Texas Ranger versus John Spartan, Demolition Man! Andel Sanap: The Octagon style cage has been set up, and soon these two men will enter to do battle. Five 3 minute rounds of action, winner by submission, knock out, or judges decision. Al Rossi: Um, yeah, about that… Andel Sanap: What’s the matter, Al? I thought that is how MMA contests are decided on Earth. Al Rossi: Well, they are, but that’s not how we’re going to go about this. If both men are on their feet after five rounds, we’re just going to lower the roof of the cage, teleport in some weapons, and let them fight to the finish. Andel Sanap: … That… would be satisfactory. Al Rossi: I knew you’d love it! Let’s throw it down to Justin! Justin Roberts: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Bunker! The following contest is scheduled for 5 3 minute rounds, with an overtime. Introducing first, representing the state of Texas, Texas Ranger… CORDEEEEEEEEEELL WALKEEEEEEEEEER! Andel Sanap: Whoops and whistles from the Texans in attendance! Walker strides focused into the cage and acknowledges the crowd. Justin Roberts: And his opponent, representing the police force of San Angeles… SERGEANT! JOOOOOOOOOOHN SPARTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! Al Rossi: Spartan walks out to the cheers from his section! The Scraps are going ballistic for him, while the more reserved San Angelenos are just golf clapping and looking nervous. Andel Sanap: To be fair, they don’t have anything quite like this in their time, Al. Al Rossi: The two men meet in the center of the cage as the doors lock behind them. Cordell Walker: You do good work, Spartan, but you’re too wild. John Spartan: What the hell’s that supposed to mean? Cordell Walker: We’re both law enforcement, but you can’t seem to catch a crook without taking out a city block. John Spartan: Hey! I do what needs to be done to catch scumbags! And if you got a problem with that, I’ll bust you up and shove the pieces in that stupid hat of yours! Referee: Okay, gentlemen, let’s keep this a clean fight. Obey my instructions at all times. Return your corners, and on my signal come out fighting. Andel Sanap: The tension is mounting as Walker and Spartan take their places. Al Rossi: We’re seconds away from Round 1! Who will win this battle of the supercops? Referee: Combatants ready? 3! 2! 1! Commence combat! OK: Both Walker and Spartan are at full strength. The fight is contested in five 3 minute rounds, with an anything goes overtime with weapons. Win by submission or KO. Game On!

*THE FOLLOWING BROADCAST IS BEING PRESENTED BY THE TRANSDIMENSIONAL COMBAT COMMISSION. ALL COMBATANTS MUST AGREE TO FOLLOW TCC GUIDELINES AT ALL TIMES. SAFETY OF ATENDEES IS NOT GUARANTEED.* *THIS IS BATTLE WAS PRE-RECORDED IN THE BUNKER DURING THE REIGN OF THE 9.* Al Rossi: Hellooooooooooo, fight fans! That’s right! It’s Al and Andel, back again with another Bunker Battle! And tonight you and the fans here with us live are in for a treat! Andel Sanap: Indeed, Al. This evening’s contest will feature the protégés of two of the most skilled marksman in their multiverses. It’s the heir to the Hawkeye name Kate Bishop versus Sportsmaser’s daughter and Green Arrow’s partner Artemis Crock. Al Rossi: We’ve put together a challenging gauntlet for these two! First, we will test their skills in a 1 on 1 archery tournament. Highest points scored on the targets wins the round. Then, we’ll have them face off against our battle droids that Andel generously provided from his multiverse. Most enemies destroyed wins the round. And if the score is tied after 2 rounds, we’re gonna give these two full reign of the Bunker. Last archer standing wins! Andel Sanap: And for added difficulty, the combatants will only be using their normal arrows. No gimmicks, this battle will be won on skill and will. Let us send it down to Justin Roberts! Justin Roberts: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Bunker! The following contest is a three-part gauntlet. First archer to win 2 rounds, wins the battle! Introducing first…. Chloe Bourgeois: HelloOoOo, everyone! Al Rossi: Oh boy. Andel Sanap: Ladies and gentlemen, Miss Crock and Miss Bishop are already standing alongside Mr. Roberts for his introductions. But now he has been interrupted as Miss Bourgeois is walking into the Bunker, accompanied by a nervous-looking Philippa. Al Rossi: And don’t look now, Andel, but Chloe is carrying a longbow of her own. Kate Bishop: Okay, um, I thought this was just supposed to be a 1 on 1 thing? Artemis Crock: It was. What do you want, Chloe? Chloe Bourgeois: I just decided that it was only fair to show the fans what real archery looks like. Kate Bishop: You… are an archer? I just thought you were a stuck-up brat. Chloe Bourgeois: Oh, I am so much more than a stuck-up… HEY!! Philippa Forrester: Chloe, I really think we should just get back to the locker room so that the girls can have their battle. Chloe Bourgeois: No! Not until I show everyone that not only am I France’s greatest superhero, I am also France’s greatest archer! It’s in my blood! My great, great, great grandpa fought at the Battle of Agincourt! The first battle where longbows were ever used! Artemis Crock: Pretty sure that was the British who used longbows against the French. Chloe Bourgeois: Ugh! Ridiculous! Utterly ridiculous! Come on, Philippa! Just do as I told you! Andel Sanap: Miss Bourgeois drags Philippa in front of one of the targets that were set up for the first round. She pulls out an apple from her purse and sets it on Philippa’s head. Al Rossi: Which slides off. Chloe is fuming as she tries to get the apple to stay before just having Philippa hold the apple in place on her head and stomp over to the firing line. She pulls out an arrow. She seems baffled by which way the arrow is supposed to be facing in the bow. Artemis Crock: Pointy bit goes toward the target. Chloe Bourgeois: I know that! It’s just these are different arrows than the ones I was practicing with. Philippa Forrester: Um, Chloe? Could I go to the back now? Chloe Bourgeois: Just stay still! Stop moving around! Your making it harder for me to aim at that stupid apple! Kate Bishop: I really think you should just put the bow down, Chloe. Chloe Bourgeois: And I say you should OW! Al Rossi: The arrow’s lose! Chloe misfired! The arrow is ricocheting around the Bunker! Fans are ducking to avoid getting hit! Andel Sanap: Miss Bishop and Miss Crock spring into action! Both pull out arrows and fire. Bishop’s explodes open into a net that pushes Miss Forrester out of the way, and Crock’s arrow swings around to collide with Miss Bourgeois’! The errant shaft lands in the floor and Miss Crock’s hits the ceiling. Artemis Crock: Pretty sure we were supposed to only have normal arrows for this battle. Kate Bishop: Oh, yeah. Don’t know how that one got in my quiver. Um, almost like I don’t know how you could make that shot unless your arrow was gimmicked to curve like that. Artemis Crock: Do you want to talk, or do you want to get down to business? Al Rossi: Well, folks, as Chloe is being led out by security and Justin gets Philippa out of harms way, it looks like Artemis and Kate are stepping up to the firing line and are ready for action. Andel Sanap: Which of these two combatants will be victorious? Referee: Combatants ready? 3! 2! 1! Commence combat! OK: Kate Bishop is the version from Hawkeye and Artemis Crock is the version from Young Justice. 1st round: Whoever gets the highest score on the targets. 2nd round: Whoever destroys the most battle droids. 3rd round: Last archer standing. Game On!

*THE FOLLOWING BROADCAST IS BEING PRESENTED BY THE TRANSDIMENSIONAL COMBAT COMMISSION. ALL COMBATANTS MUST AGREE TO FOLLOW TCC GUIDELINES AT ALL TIMES. SAFETY OF ATENDEES IS NOT GUARANTEED.* *THIS IS BATTLE WAS PRE-RECORDED IN THE BUNKER DURING THE REIGN OF THE 9.* Al Rossi: HelloOoOoOoOo, fight fans! It’s Al and Andel, back in the Bunker to bring you some 9-less action! Andel Sanap: And certainly a curious one, Al. I’m sure the fans are wondering what kind of conflict they will be witnessing given the combatants featured. Al Rossi: No kidding! It’s an athletic battle between the friendly faces of our childhoods: The characters of Sesame Street and the Hundred Acre Woods! Now, some of you bloodthirsty viewers might be a little disappointed that we aren’t going to be getting an all-out brawl today. But considering the temperaments of all of our ‘combatants’, we’ve set up a contest that should prove be very interesting. Welcome to Bunker Baseball! Andel Sanap: I have heard you describing this game for some time. I didn’t expect my first exposure to it would be provided by teams of stuffed animals and friendly monsters. Al Rossi: But they are all at least familiar with the rules of the game. Officially this will be the Hundred Acre Woods Hunny Pots vs the Sesame Street All Stars, in front a crowd of excited fans in our baseball field set up on our asteroid home away from TCC Arena. Already we can see our teams milling about the field and stretching out. How would you like to run through the batting order for the Sesame Street crew, Andel? Andel Sanap: Well, if you insist. The ‘leadoff hitter’ will be Cookie Monster, who will also be playing 2nd base. Next will be Telly Monster at right field and Zoe at shortstop. Grover will be at cleanup and at center, followed by Big Bird at 1st and Oscar the Grouch who will be catcher. 7th is Elmo at 3rd base, 8th is Ernie at left, and finally Bert at pitcher. The manager will be the beloved Bob Johnson. Al Rossi: Nicely done, Andel! Now let’s go through the Hundred Acre Woods team. Tigger, despite being the pitcher, has also volunteered to hit leadoff. 2nd base-bear, Winnie the Pooh will hit second, then left fielder Rabbit, then 1st base-bird Owl to cleanup. Center fielder Kanga will bat next, followed by 3rd base-gopher… uh Gopher, right fielder Roo, catcher Eeyore, and bringing up the rear will be the shortstop Piglet. And of course, their friend Christopher Robin will be managing from the dugout. Andel Sanap: 9 innings of baseball with our own officials calling the balls and strikes. Umm, Al? What’s Chloe doing on the field? Al Rossi: Huh? We aren’t going to be doing any interviews before the game! Chloe Bourgeois: Helloooo, everyone! Despite being from France, I’ve managed to learn all about your cute little American game of… uh baseball. And I know that the way you start these things is to sing the national anthem! And who better to sing it than… me! Al Rossi: Oh boy. Andel Sanap: I’ve got a bad feeling about this. Chloe Bourgeois: So stand up! Put your hands on your hearts, and listen to the best rendition of the national anthem you’ve ever heard! Ahem. Ohhhh, say can you SeEeEeEeE! By the twilight’s last GLEEEEEEEAMING! Al Rossi: Well, I haven’t heard the national anthem sung quite that way before. Andel Sanap: Here comes the official! I believe he is throwing Miss Bourgeois out of the game! Al Rossi: As Chloe storms off, I think we can gloss over the anthem. The Hunny Pots take the field on defense as Cookie Monster steps up to the bat. Eeyore stands behind him with a catcher’s mitt in his mouth. Tigger warms up on the mound. Tigger: Okay, buddy boy! Hope you’re ready for my knuckle-under-sideways-overhead-curveball! With a half a twist of lemonade! Cookie Monster: Me no want lemonade! Me want home run! And cookies! Rabbit: Tigger! You’re not supposed to tell the batter what you’re pitching! Big Bird: Good luck, Cookie Monster! You can do it! Referee: Combatants ready? 3! 2! 1! Play ball! OK: Sesame Street All Stars: Bert, Oscar the Grouch, Big Bird, Cookie Monster, Zoe, Elmo, Telly Monster, Grover, and Ernie. Hundred Acre Woods Hunny Pots: Tigger, Eeyore, Owl, Winnie the Pooh, Piglet, Gopher, Roo, Kanga, and Rabbit. 9 innings of baseball, extra innings if necessary. Rules loosely enforced given the players involved. Game On!

Al Rossi: HelloOoOoOoOo, fight fans! We’re back from the Bunker! It’s Al and Andel with another great one on one match up for you! Andel Sanap: Indeed, Al. For tonight we are going to witness a very unique face off between two women who are both much more than what meets the eye. Lucy Miller, a woman who upon ingesting a mind enhancing drug was unable to unlock the full power of her mind. And her opponent? The Supreme Being, the Fifth Element: Leeloominai Lekatariba Lamina-Tchai Ekbat de Sebat! Al Rossi: Er, but we’ll just be calling her Leeloo for this fight. Andel Sanap: I was only trying to be precise. Al Rossi: Right. Earlier today we had Philippa and Chloe… ahem… attempt to get interviews with Lucy and Leeloo. Here’s what happened. Chloe Bourgeois: You should just let me do all the talking. Philippa Forrester: Chloe, we’re here to listen to the combatants, not you. Chloe Bourgeois: Hmph! I should think I would be more interesting to listen to than these two! Philippa Forrester: More interesting than the most advanced human mind in existence and a woman who can summon power strong enough to nuke a living moon? Chloe Bourgeois: Exactly! Philippa Forrester: …Let’s just check on Leeloo. Here’s her dressing room. Leeloo: Djala?! Philippa Forrester: Whoa! Sorry! I’m Philippa and this is Chloe. We wanted to talk to you about your upcoming fight with Lucy? Leeloo: Leeloo Mul-ti-pass! Philippa Forrester: Yes, that’s a very nice multipass. Now how about this fight? Leeloo: Mul-ti-pass! Chloe Bourgeois: Mph! Hahaha! That was real informative! Philippa Forrester: Ok, if you think it’s so easy, you do the next interview. Chloe Bourgeois: Gladly! Oh, Miss Miller! Lucy: Yes? Chloe Bourgeois: Hello, there! My name is… Lucy: Chloe Bourgeois, daughter of Andre Bourgeois, mayor of Paris, and Audrey Bourgeois, fashion mogul. Chloe Bourgeois: That’s right! See, Philippa? Everyone with taste knows about me! Philippa Forrester: Oh brother. Chloe Bourgeois: But seriously, about this little fight thing… Lucy: At the present time I am in the middle of preparing my strategy and do not have time for questions. Goodbye. Chloe Bourgeois: WHAT?! How dare she slam the door in my face! Ridiculous! Utterly ridiculous! Philippa Forrester: Well, that’s how it goes. Chloe Bourgeois: Shouldn’t be surprised, really. Anyone who likes drinks like she does has to be weird! Philippa Forrester: How do you know what she likes to drink? Chloe Bourgeois: I uh… was in her dressing room earlier and I was thirsty. I saw she had some Capri Sun pouches so I took one. Philippa Forrester: … Chloe Bourgeois: What? Phillipa Forrester: Chloe, this pouch. Was it clear, and the liquid inside was blue? Chloe Bourgeois: Yeah! And it tasted disgusting! Why? Phillipa Forrester: Chloe! That was the drug Lucy uses to her expand her brain capacity! How could you possibly think eating something in a combatant’s room was a good idea?! Chloe Bourgeois: Well, I figured the probability of the liquid being poisonous was extremely low. And my body was needing to be stabilized by nourishment to prevent deterioration. … UGH! Why am I talking like a geek now?!?! Phillipa Forrester: Umm, back to Al and Andel at the desk! Al Rossi: So, does this mean Chloe is going to turn into a laptop now? Andel Sanap: Thankfully, we’ve already managed to start pumping the CPH4 out of her system. But let’s move along to the fight itself. Specifically the rules. Al Rossi: Right! Because this is going to more than just a straight up brawl. This is also going to be a race against time! The fight is going to take place inside our bulletproof Octagon cage. The cage is sitting on a platform that is an exact duplicate of the element temple, with the four podiums designed to hold the four elements surrounding the cage. As the battle takes place, two priests of the 50th Level Parrish will be setting the elements in position. Once they are in place, Leeloo will be able to access them to create the Divine Light, which should be more than enough to atomize Lucy. Andel Sanap: But Lucy is not going to be defenseless. She will be entering the cage with her brain at 15% capacity. This will allow her physical strength and fighting skills to match what Leeloo has learned. The CPH4 will continue to evolve her until she reaches 100% capacity, whereupon she will have mastered powers ranging from telepathy to telekinesis to time travel! Al Rossi: Or will Leeloo be able to KO Lucy before she can reach that point? Only one way to find out! Take it, Justin! Justin Roberts: Ladies and Gentlemen, the following contest is a singles match, and can only be won by knout out! The firearms and weapons hanging along the fence of cage are legal! In the corner to my right, LUCYYYYYYYYYYYY MILLEEEEEEEEEEER! And in the corner to my left, LEEEEEEEEELOOOOOOOOOO! Al Rossi: The crowd cheers as Leeloo strikes a pose and motions for Lucy to bring it. Andel Sanap: She certainly doesn’t seem that worried. Has she already calculated her path to victory? Referee: Combatants ready? 3! 2! 1! Commence combat! OK: Both combatants are at full strength. Lucy is at 15% brain capacity (enhance strength and fighting skills). Leeloo has all of her martial arts knowledge. The cage contains multiple firearms and hand to hand weapons for them to use. As they fight, Lucy gets closer to 100% brain capacity, and the priests get the elements from backstage and placed around the cage. Once they are able to access their full powers, anything goes. Game On!

This is a continuation of Fox Mulder/Fox (Fraternity) vs Fox McCloud/Fox (Gargoyles). Andel Sanap: Fraternity Fox draws her semiautomatic pistol and fires! Pack Fox drops and rolls out of the way as the bullet curves towards her! Al Rossi: Frat takes aim again but Pack leaps towards her! Frat blocks the strike and delivers a backfist that sends Pack reeling! Something is starting to materialize in the ring! Andel Sanap: The first loot box! Pack staggers to it and rips it open. She reaches inside and pulls out something. Al Rossi: Frat is taking aim! Pack is throwing it! Grenade! Right on target as it explodes and surrounds Frat in gas! Andel Sanap: Pack rushes to her corner as Frat gasps for breath. She slams on the turnbuckle and switches places with McCloud. Starfox is in! Al Rossi: The gas beginning to clear out. Frat shakes out the cobwebs and opens fire at McCloud! But there’s the reflector! No way a bullet is breaking through that! McCloud takes to the air with the booster pack and draws his blaster! Quick fires and leaves Frat staggered! She’s trying to get a bead on McCloud but he’s moving to quick for her! YOWCH! Right on target! McCloud nails her with the blaster! Andel Sanap: Fraternity Fox is down! McCloud lands for the cover! One! Two! Three! She’s out! The official is checking on her but Fraternity Fox has been eliminated! The official is going to the corner and hitting the turnbuckle. Al Rossi: Out goes Frat to be checked on by Mercy, in comes a rather nervous looking Mulder. He’s reaching for his pistol and… ZZAAAP! Al Rossi: … Um, well…. Referee: 1! 2! 3! Ring the bell! Winners: Fox McCloud and Fox! Andel Sanap: McCloud just too quick on the draw for the X-Files agent. The official is holding up the arms of McCloud and Fox, but Fox doesn’t look to pleased. Al Rossi: Here comes Philippa and Chloe for the post fight interview. Let’s see if we can get some answers here. Philippa Forrester: Congratulations to you both. Nice work especially to you, McCloud. You practically soloed that match! Fox McCloud: It was an honor to be asked to team up with Fox. The other team was good, it’s just a question of better tech. Fox: Really? That’s how we end this fight? Chloe Bourgeois: What are you mad about? You won the thing. Who cares? Fox: I do, little girl. I signed up for this fight because I wanted to test my skills against that other Fox. Instead, I’m only able to be in the ring with her for a couple of seconds before this furball steals the spotlight for himself. Who’s idea was it to have that Fed be involved in this fight in the first place? Al Rossi: Ummm. Andel Sanap: Al? Al Rossi: What? I like the X-Files! So sue me. Fox: I’m sure these fans would want a more competitive match than that! Wouldn’t you? Andel Sanap: The crowd’s cheers seem to imply they do! Fox: Then I say we give you a better match! If Fox is fully healed, I challenge her to a match right here and now! You and me! No gimmicks! Just our skill, strength, and weapons! Last Woman Standing! What do you say, people?! Al Rossi: An impassioned speech from Fox! And the crowd is loving it! Crowd: YES! YES! YES! YES! Andel Sanap: And look who’s coming back down the ramp to the ring! Fraternity Fox is back on her feet! Mercy is following after her taking some med scans, but doesn’t appear to be stopping her! Fox rolls into the ring and goes face to face with Fox! Al Rossi: The assassin is clearly eager for a re-match! And I say let them go! Referee! Let’s do this! Referee: OK, ladies. This match will be contested under Last Woman Standing rules. Whoever is unable to answer the count of 10, loses. You are allowed your base weaponry and equipment, and combat can take place throughout the Bunker. Combatants ready? 3! 2! 1! Commence combat! Game On!

Al Rossi: Helloooo, fight fans! Welcome back to the Bunker! It’s Al Rossi and Andel Sanap here to give you some more multiversal combat action! But today is a special occasion. Andel Sanap: Yes, Al. For many years, contests like what you are about to witness were made possible by the entity known as Fox. By maintaining dimensions like ours at the Bunker, they have allowed fight fans to see battles they’d never imagined were possible. Al Rossi: And keep guys like us employed. Sadly, Fox is going to be stepping away from the game to focus on other projects. But in celebration of all their hard work, we have cooked up a great tag team bout in their honor! In honor of Fox, we proudly present the Tag Team Fox Match! On one side, we’ve got Fox Mulder of the X-Files and Fox of the Fraternity. On the other we’ve got Fox McCloud, leader of Team Star Fox, and Fox of the Pack! Andel Sanap: Hmm. Al Rossi: Hmm? What are you ‘hmm-ing’ about? Andel Sanap: I’m somewhat concerned of Fox’s presence in the Bunker. Isn’t she romantically involved with David Xanatos? She has a direct link with a member of the 9. Al Rossi: Andel, we’ve been over this. Our psychics have scanned her brain and found nothing. Our techs have checked her for any tracking equipment and found nothing. And she’s going to have her mind wiped just like everyone else. Andel Sanap: Perhaps, but I have a… Al Rossi: Bad feeling about this, I know. Let’s just pass it down to Justin Roberts in the ring for the rules and introductions. Justin Roberts: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Bunker! As you can see, our combatants will be fighting in a standard sized wrestling ring. At various points during the match, various loot boxes will be beamed into the ring. Some of them containing useful weapons and equipment, some not. All other handheld weapons and equipment that our combatants use normally is legal. Only one member of each team will be allowed in the ring at a time. The other teammate must stay on the floor outside the ring. In order to tag out, the teammate in the ring must hit one of the four top turnbuckles. This will activate a transporter that will cause the teammates to trade places automatically. The team that is able to pin or submit both of their opponents, wins! And now, let’s introduce the teams! First, Team Fraternity X! Fox Mulder and Fox! Andel Sanap: A cheer from the fans in attendance as Team Fraternity X makes their way to the ring. Mulder is looking a little unsure of his partner, but Fox is looking focused on the task at hand! Justin Roberts: And their opponents! Team Star Pack! Fox McCloud and Fox! Al Rossi: Fox somersaults down the ramp to the other side of the ring, followed by McCloud! She certainly knows how to get the crowd behind her! Andel Sanap: But will that help her against an assassin like Fox? And with the randomizing engines creating loot boxes during the battle, you can’t take your eyes off anyone! Al Rossi: Now the ref is motioning to the teams to choose who starts. Fraternity Fox confidently steps through the ropes! Pack Fox looks impressed and joins her! Guess the lady foxes will start this match! Or is that vixens? Andel Sanap: Here’s the official! Let it begin! Al Rossi: Thanks for everything, Fox! Referee: Combatants ready? 3! 2! 1! Commence combat! OK: Tag Match rules. The combatants just need to touch one of the turnbuckles to ‘make a tag’. They are allowed their own handheld weaponry/equipment. The Bunker will generate loot boxes containing useful/not useful equipment. Combatants are eliminated by pinfall or submission. Match continues until both teammates are eliminated. Game On!

Al Rossi: Helloooo, fight fans and Happy St. Patrick’s Day! That’s right! Do not adjust your devices! We are back! It is indeed Al Rossi and Jedi Master Andel Sanap! We are coming to you live, but not from TCC Arena! Andel Sanap: Yes, ladies and gentlemen. This event is being streamed from what we have termed ‘the Bunker’. Suffice to say that it is an underground arena tucked away in a pocket dimension. We cannot be more specific than that, and even the audience in attendance for this match will have the location of the Bunker wiped from their memories when the contest is over. Al Rossi: Not something that we enjoy doing, Andel, but it’s what we need to do in order to make certain this place doesn’t get found by the TCC. After the events of the Battlesphere Battle Royal, the TCC board seemed no longer content with running the show from the shadows. With their new enforcer, Battlesphere winner Miss America, in their power, the 8 became the 9 and started a series of questionable fights, all of which ended with Miss America executing the losers. Andel Sanap: Thankfully, Mercy was able to revive them and return them to their rightful dimensions. But when the 9 caught wind of what she had done, she was forced to flee from TCC Arena, or face the wrath of Miss America. Al Rossi: In the face of all this, me, Andel, and several other former TCC personnel have joined forces to start putting on fights the way the TCC used to do. Not every battle has to be to the death! And the fans should still be allowed to view these fights in person! No more of this crap of having competitors tear each other apart just for the amusement of the 9! Andel Sanap: I wholeheartedly agree, Al. It is good to see the fans again. There is a spirit of fellowship and good will in the Bunker as the St. Patrick’s Day festivities have gone on throughout the day. The finest alcohol from across the multiverse has been provided, and good times have been had by all. Except for that brawl going on between Doctor Holiday, Bo Rai Cho, and Captain Sparrow. Al Rossi: Ah, don’t worry about it. We’ve got our security surrounding the barroom to make sure the fight stays contained. Hopefully. But for our first battle here in the Bunker, we have a real fun match up for the fans here and at home. In honor of St. Patrick’s Day, we have invited a competitor who in my opinion embodies Irish spirit and culture: the Lord of the Dance! Andel Sanap: Athletically gifted, with a touch of magic, the Lord of the Dance leapt at the chance to represent Planet Ireland for our opening bout. And when we wanted to find a competitor who could match the Lord’s performance, charisma, and ability, only one dancer came to mind. The Moonwalker! Al Rossi: Early today, we were able to get a moment with our competitors. Here’s Philippa Forrester and her.. um… co-correspondent, Chloe Bourgeois. Philippa Forrester: Hey, fight fans! It’s Philippa… Chloe Bourgeois: And your favorite sideline reporter, Chloe Bourgeois! Philippa Forrester: Um, Chloe? We’ve been over this? Chloe Bourgeois: Oh, yeah, sorry. Just figured the fans would be excited to see me again. Philippa Forrester: But they’re not here to see us. They’re here to hear from our guests. We have with us the Lord of the Dance and the Moonwalker. We’d like to welcome you both to the Bunker, and wish you both a Happy St. Patrick’s Day. Lord of the Dance: Thanks, Philippa. I’m real excited to be here and can’t wait to see what Moonwalker has in store for me. Chloe Bourgeois: Yeah, yeah. But I got a question for Moonwalker. Moonwalker: Go ahead, sweetheart. Chloe Bourgeois: How do you feel your outfit compares to Captain Shirtless over here? Philippa Forrester: Chloe! Chloe Bourgeois: What? It’s a relevant question! We got a guy dressed in a classic white suit and a guy who looks like he’s trying out for the next Magic Mike! Lord of the Dance: Can’t say I’ve had many complaints. What do you think, Philippa? Philippa Forrester: Hmm? Oh, I mean um, you look great! I mean the outfit looks great. Uh, moving on! This fight is scheduled to take place under 2 out of 3 falls rules. Your first fall will be a dance off, winner to be decided by the crowd. The second fall will be a fist fight, winner decided by KO. The third fall, if needed, will be anything goes. All magic based powers will be allowed. Last man standing wins. Moonwalker: Nice! But I don’t think this is gonna need three rounds. Lord of Dance: Oh do you, now? Let’s just get out there and put on a show these people will never forget! Moonwalker: You’re on! Philippa Forrester: Good show of sportsmanship from our competitors. Back to Al and Andel in the booth! Chloe Bourgeois: Hmph. I was hoping they were going to start fighting. Al Rossi: Well, despite some pot stirring from Chloe, it appears both the Lord of the Dance and Moonwalker are ready to go! Andel Sanap: I do hope Miss Forrester is able to be a good influence on Miss Bourgeois. But for now, it’s time for Justin Roberts to give the introductions! Let’s go to the dance floor! Justin Roberts: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a 2 out of 3 falls match! Introducing first, from Planet Ireland, the LOOOOOOOORD OF THE DAAAAAAAANCE! Al Rossi: A rousing cheer from the Irish contingent as the Lord stepdances onto the floor, accompanied by the Sprite. She’ll be important to give the Lord a boost of magical endurance if we go to the third fall. The Lord strikes his trademark pose and goes to his corner. Justin Roberts: And his opponent, from Los Angeles, the MOOOOOOONWALKEEEEEER! Andel Sanap: The strains of Smooth Criminal are being blasted over the sound system as the Moonwalker struts into the Bunker. The crowd goes wild as he moonwalks over to the Lord and hits a pose of his own before going back to his corner. Al Rossi: This is certainly going to be a competitive game of one-upmanship in this first round. Neither of these competitors want to be outshined in a dance off, but do they want to expend so much energy in the first fall, they don’t have the strength for the fist fight? No more time for questions! Here’s the official! Referee: Competitors ready? First fall! 3! 2! 1! Commence combat! OK: 1st fall-Dance Off. Win over the crowd. 2nd fall-Fist fight. Win by KO. 3rd fall-Anything goes. All magic powers are legal. Moonwalker can transform, Lord of the Dance can summon his backup dancers and have Sprite restore him. Happy St. Patrick’s Day! Here’s to another 100 match ups! Game On!